Thursday, April 7, 2011

Equal rights means you take ownership TOO!

Hey you! – yes you Sir...
The politition who told me he would NOT be voting to make abortion a health issue, instead of a crime...

Let’s talk about how YOU can also be a baby killer.
Yes, you!
I’m a feminist, which means EQUAL rights for all so I think it is about time you took ownership of your half of the responsibility.

Let’s say you are feeling randy.
So you have a hand shandy.
Oh no, they aren’t viable then?

Ok, so you are feeling randy and you have an ‘appropriate’ receptacle for your sperm (a Woman, married to you)
But you used a condom??
Oh no, this also isn’t a problem?

How convenient how they aren’t viable life until you are no longer the one responsible...

Even if you are a purist, and you don’t use condoms... who can afford 9 kids in this expensive world? So what do you do?
I won’t expect you to explain to me how you don’t have a gazillion children right now, but short of you killing some future life off I’m lost for ideas.

So let’s say you follow all the “honouring future life” rules and have a beautiful baby.
She is perfect, ten fingers, and ten toes.
She grows to be beautiful, smart, witty and well liked in her community.
She could be ANYTHING. A doctor, lawyer, diplomat, scientist, leader...

Then at 16 she decides to have sex, or is pressured into sex. (we won’t get into the stats on rape in NZ since you are probably patronising enough to think you can ‘let’ rape victims have an abortion).

And that sex causes a baby.
She probably won’t tell you until and abortion is too late, because if pre-marital sex and contraception are off the cards, then your judgement is pretty much guaranteed when she slips up.

Now what? This baby of yours... her future is about to change. And change BIG.

This pregnancy has a
10-15% chance of a miscarriage in NZ at her age according to statistics NZ.
If there are twins there is a 2% chance of still birth
If triplets there is around 8% chance of still birth.
‘Your baby’ has a 5% chance of postpartum bleeding.

If any of these events are, or cause a death, and she didn’t use contraception (including the morning after pill and abortifacient pharmaceutical drugs), or have an abortion because of you, was the subsequent miscarriage, stillbirth or maternal death YOUR fault?
If we are going to blame the loss of a future life on me, surely you can own your part in this mess?
No? Gee, what a surprise.

If your little girl and her baby survive the very real statistics behind pregnancy and child birth she will have physical reminders for the rest of her life.
Options include: Stretch marks, varicose veins, incontinence, linear nigra, c-section scar, episiotomy scarring.

Then what?
She gives up her self-centred fulfilling future (for now) to take care of this baby?
Or will you make her adopt it out?
Would you give her a choice?
Why put her through all this only to then take that baby off her?

In fact, if you would give HER a choice, why not me?

In fact – what makes YOU qualified to make any kind of decision for either of us at all?
Since you take NO responsibility for YOUR choice’s effects on others, why should we care what you think?

Because I do not take abortion lightly
I remember every. Single. Woman that I ever assisted in a D&C on in the public health system.
Not one of them was happy to be there.
Every one of them wanted to be.
Every one of them knew what was happening, and owned their decision.

So how about you stop judging and listen for once, to the people this actually effects. Listen to the voices from the lives that actually live it.

Because your opinion? Doesn’t matter to me any more than mine appears to matter to you.


  1. This is in honour of a certain politician on twitter who will be voting to keep abortion a crime...

    Politician @scuba_nurse yip, amazing ay, we have a differing view. Not all Maori have the same view and why should we. Do Pakeha?

    (how did he know what my race is? My pic is a FROG)

    Scubanurse @ Politician No problem with differing views. The issue is that YOU have the power to make legal changes and I'm the one stuck pregnant.

    Politician @scuba_nurse gimme your baby, ill look after him/her.
    (Is he frakking serious??? What an insensitive ass.)

    Scubanurse @ Politician too literal. I prefer support for solo mums. Legislation to help teen mums stay in school, and recognition of parenting as a job.

    No reply to this, gee what a surprise.

    He told me he DID have to live with the choice of withholding abortion rights, because he would help with his metaphorical daughter's baby.
    When you have to step down from your job and take ownership fully, I might actually believe you.

  2. <3 <3 <3 This. And what an arsehole. No one, if it is not their body, can fully know what it's like, so should not be so arrogant as to think they have the right to make such decisions for other people. Unless of course they don't consider uterus-having people deserving of full human dignity, decision making, and self determination... hmmm...

    I mean, clearly cis-men are the ones who should be making the decisions on something they'll never experience. Perfectly fair and logical.

  3. Brilliant!
    I think I've gotta follow you on twitter with a wit like that.

  4. "gimme your baby, ill look after him/her"

    Fine - I'm only 5 weeks in, here, take it. Now. Where would you like me to insert it?

  5. For want of a general thread (no criticism intended) can I say here how much I enjoy your blog.
    Your Helen Keller quote (top of page) is hugely significant to me and I was delighted to find it here.
    Mind if I paste it, in case others hadn't noticed it or grown too familiar with it?
    "I long to accomplish a great and noble task, but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble."
    Thanks scuba nurse.

  6. You are most welcome to, of course.
    And no sweat on the random placement of a "hello" post, there aren't too many beige entries here!!

  7. I think we should do everything we can to lower the abortion rate in this country, it is a horrible way for a civilised society to mange human health.
    I can accept that only a woman knows what it is like. I don't accept that I as a male have no right to comment on the issues surrounding the procreation of my species.
    It would be great if this awful procedure could be voluntarily reduced through lack of use.


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